Three Pathways on how to Forgive: The Triangle of Forgiveness
Navigating the Pathways to Inner Peace and Reconciliation
Forgiveness
For - give - ness
For - In "forgiveness," "for" means doing it thoroughly, like really, really letting go.
Give - "Give" in "forgiveness" means willingly deciding not to hold onto dense feelings or anger anymore.
Ness - "Ness" in "forgiveness" makes it a word describing the state of being when you've let go of hard feelings and are at peace with someone who hurt you.
Forgiveness is a powerful concept, often underestimated in its ability to bring about inner peace and reconciliation. In this journey, we’ll explore the profound meaning behind forgiveness, its significance in our lives, and practical techniques to embrace it.
I really like the translation in Aramaic which is the spoken language of Jesus Christ.
The word used for forgiveness is ‘shlama’ which can be translated to
The Restoration Of Peace
I feeeeeel that… WOW ! The restoration of peace.
When I say those words and feel their vibration. A vision of a natural spring in my belly has just been discovered or rediscovered or in the sense of relating it to the self, remembered. This spring now discovered, remembered flows through my body, unlocking my heart,
to be in love once again
to be in joy once again
To remember the peace that I am
Ho’oponopono is an ancient Hawaiian
practise emphasising reconciliation,
forgiveness, and personal responsibility.
Rooted in Hawaiian culture, it seeks to restore
harmony and resolve conflicts by speaking
these 4 key phrases
"I'm sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you."
I have experienced this powerful Hawaiian healing many times and have witnessed the many people this healing has helped.
If you are not familiar with this practice and you are finding it challenging to forgive someone, something, yourself.
Then try this,..
Think, feel, imagine the situation, person, yourself
& repeat the 4 key phrases
"I'm sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you."
As many times as you need to
Until you feel complete, feel a change, feel a release in your being.
You can also do multiple sessions of this and you can say the phrases in any order.
During my journey of life and my path of forgiveness. This framework was created as a result of my lived experience, my pain and my healing.
I call it “The Triangle Of Forgiveness”
This visual model serves as three pathways to experience forgiveness
‘Forgiveness with Self’ Forgiving yourself, in the privacy of your own heart, soul and spirit which is the most important, to let that poison out.
‘Forgiveness with other Physically’ To come together physically with the person involved and find forgiveness together which takes a deep level of vulnerability and courage
‘Forgiveness with other Spiritually’ To meet together in the astral/spiritual realm/ unseen worlds with the ‘higher selves’. This is a pathway that is available if the person isn’t able to communicate for whatever reason and also they may have already passed on
Vulnerable share story time…,
**Trigger Warning**
This personal story involves themes of physical abuse.
I won’t mention specifically who it was, I’m going to use a very vague term such as “this man” because we have a good relationship now and he is a respectful man in his field of work and to our family. He also no longer does any of the things that I am going to share with you but that doesn’t mean what happened to me wasn't right.
My journey with forgiveness
I learnt forgiveness at a very young age
I learnt it at a young age because… I had 2 choices.
1st choice to hate, to resent and allow that to fester to eventually manifest itself into a life of addiction, drugs and violence which is a vision I saw
OR….
2nd choice to forgive, and soften into love and gratitude
To walk a life of expansion and curiosity
This is how it happened..,
At the tender age of 9-11, my daily life was a struggle, the fear of getting hurt was real. The daily question of “Am I going to get a beating today?” from 'this man.'
The ‘beatings’ were almost every day, mainly for no reason at all. It was a shitty situation until this one time, after this one beating, it all changed.
Bam! One punch to the head. Bam! A second. Bam! A third. I can still feel the sharp sting of each blow. I remember it clearly
But then, something extraordinary happened. As the pain subsided, an overwhelming feeling began to well up within me. It was as if a light had switched on inside, and I couldn't help but think and feel
'WOW! I am so grateful that you feel safe enough to express these big emotions to me. That you feel safe enough to be this vulnerable and share your anger with me, on me, at me.'
In that transformative moment, a wave of forgiveness swept over me.
Love and gratitude replaced anger and hate. My heart softened, my mind softened, and my spirit was reminded of compassion.
It was then, right there in that moment, that I forgave him. Not just for that moment, but for every moment that would follow.
As time passed, I began to understand the pain he must have been carrying, the anguish that led him to hurt someone he loves. This profound realisation marked the beginning of my journey towards forgiveness and healing
I’ve shared this story many times, as it was a big catalyst in my journey of life and I’m always in awe of how my young awareness chose the path of healing.
To forgive
My first experience of forgiveness
The first pathway - ‘The Forgiveness Of Self’...
Because in that moment I also forgave myself
I invite you to ask yourself this question
Have you forgiven yourself?
Either for the hurt that you’ve consciously, unconsciously done or the hurt that someone has been done to you consciously or unconsciously?
"Fast forward to when I was 23. I found myself under the guidance of a mentor, a clairvoyant and healer who opened doors I never knew existed.
Simultaneously, I embarked on a journey of awakening, pursuing a diploma in energy healing in Sydney, Australia.
Back then, I didn’t quite understand the path that was unfolding before me but felt so true and right. I couldn't quite put my finger on why this pathway had captivated me. There was an unexplainable 'knowing' within me, a sense of familiarity. It was as if my childhood experiences and intuitive healing processes had prepared me for this moment, guiding me down an unforeseen but purposeful path."
My mentor introduced me to a meditation technique I call 'The Half-Way House.'
This practice transports you to a unique mental space, in your imagination, in your spiritual eye, mind's eye, a realm between the physical and astral worlds.
In my personal visualisation, I created a magical rainforest sanctuary. It boasted a meandering river, a mesmerising waterfall, and a towering mother tree that exuded an aura of serenity and nurture. This magical realm was an extension of my inner world, evolving in tandem with my own growth.
Within this ethereal realm, I was instructed by my mentor to find a hidden sanctuary—a secluded retreat like a cave, hut, or secret bush hideaway. In my realm, it materialised as a concealed cave hidden behind the cascading waters of a majestic waterfall, with only a single point of entry and exit—a door.
Here, the boundaries between the living and the departed blurred. Beings, whether of the living (their higher selves) or those who had 'passed on,' could knock on my door, seeking connection with me. Yet, the power of choice rested firmly in my hands. I could decide to invite them in, communicate through the door, peer through a peephole, make the door transparent to connect with them, or step outside to meet them on their terms. This space became my dominion, a realm where I was the master of.
"I was sitting there in meditation physically, in my spiritual eye, in this place I created. I was in my cave, and as per usual, I waited for someone to come visit.
I heard a knock on the door. I had this sense of feeling, and I think I know who it is. I looked through the peephole, and it was 'This man.' He looked open, kind, and loving.
I opened the door, but I didn't let him in. Instead, I went outside.
He apologised to me for the hurt he caused me, done to me. He explained that he was also hurting and that he was heartbroken when we (my brother and I) left without his knowing.
We left without him knowing to go live with our nan because the situation and his temper were getting worse. We were over it!"
The third pathway - ‘Forgiveness of other Spiritually’
I felt energetically lighter in my being, in my heart. It was amazing!
This is an ideal pathway if the other person is unable to communicate due to health reasons or just doesn’t have the communication IQ to do so. This is also a great pathway if the other person has passed on.
If you are interested in learning this meditation technique, “The Half-Way House”. I have a youtube video on it but I also speak about spirit guides in this video because you can also work with this space to connect with spirit guides.
The second pathway wasn’t as available to me and “This man” because he doesn’t have the communication IQ to do so but actually as I was writing this post. I realised that he showed it in his actions. He showed his love through his actions. He shows his apology through his actions and that's good enough for me
To bring this journey to a close
“The Triangle Of Forgiveness” can serve as a visual pathway on how to experience forgiveness. Forgiveness is one of the most powerful pathways for healing.
That resentment that you hold is poison, mould, that festers in the body and kills you from the inside out.
It's time to let go, not for them but for YOU
YOU deserve peace
YOU deserve love
It is your Divine Right
I LOVE YOU!!!
YOU must also love YOU as well
So let go, forgive
"Forgiveness is the final form of love." — Reinhold Niebuhr
I leave you with the healing words of this song
I release control and surrender to the flow
Of love
That will heal me
I release control and surrender to the flow
Of love
That will heal me
I release control and surrender to the flow
Of love
That will heal me, that will heal me, that will heal me
Ngā Mihi
Thank you
Cyrus K Henry